2015-12-10 17b

Breathing Deeply in Paradise

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This winter, my love and I flew down south to Punta Cana for a week long getaway. With the sun on my skin, sand in my toes, and ocean breeze in my hair, I felt blissful.

We stayed at the Sanctuary Cap Cana by Asol, at the castle (read my full review here). Ate our hearts out, drank until we couldn’t see straight, and I had my first ever cigar.

Going away and being able to just think in peace on the beach gave me a lot of time to reflect back on 2015. It was an unpleasant year for me although hard to say if it was any worse than the year before or the one before that. Its hard after such a tough and draining year to bounce back and overcome whatever else lies ahead.

There were a lot of relationships that withered in my life, people I love who left and others that were taken from me. I’m hoping to mend some of these relationships in the years to come, fingers crossed it won’t be too late. What’s worst though, was that the last embers of my relationship with my father died out completely…

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On Being Thankful

I am not going to lie. It is difficult for me to feel thankful around any time of year, let alone thanksgiving (Canadian) or when the holidays begins to roll around, when the circumstances of my life point me towards anger or denial…

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One Day I’ll Fly Away

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I follow the night
Can’t stand the light
When will I begin to live again…

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Learning to Be Alone

When I was 14 I met the love of my life. I am one of the lucky few to have found love so young. We’ve been together 9 years and plan to get married in a couple years or so.

John is wonderful. I love him. I love him so much it seems I spend every waking moment with him. At least this was the case when we were in high school and then again all throughout undergraduate studies (we went to the same school).

We were in different programs located at opposite ends of the campus but we were adamant about spending as much time with each other as much as possible to maintain a healthy relationship. It was probably more a result of finally being free to physically go out and date without parental restraints (strict traditional Asian upbringing).

Anyways, we ate together, studied together, sat around in silence together – we did everything together…

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On Moving Out as an Unmarried Asian Woman

A year ago today,  I said to my strict Asian mother, “I am putting my foot down and I am moving out.”

I had said that moving out was an issue of gaining independence, broadening my mindset and, more importantly, increasing my own sense of happiness following a period of great familial turmoil that I could no longer bear.

The response was disappointment and a lack of understanding…

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